The biggest lesson I have learnt through my own experience is that if you move through the fear, acknowledge it’s there, but just do what you want to do anyway, it gets easier and easier until the fear no longer exists. I remember my very first cold call I had to make. I kept putting it off and putting it off, until eventually I picked up the phone shaking with fear and made my call. To my delight, the lady on the other end was very pleasant. It took me a lot more calls before I got to the stage where I am today, which is I can pick up the phone and cold call anyone without even thinking about what I’m going to say, it is such a natural thing for me to do now.

I am a risk taker. I take calculated risks. Taking risks is good, but I’m not talking about anything that could physically harm you, end your life, investing in Acme’s latest Road Runner Extinguisher shares without proper investigation, or God forbid, riding on a rollercoaster! (My friends and family will find that very amusing). I am still working on my rollercoaster fear!

Let’s take for example speaking in front of people. At one time of my life the thought made me break out into a sweat and give me butterflies. Now, and being in this industry of course, I don’t think twice about it. Because I made myself get up in front of the mic whenever the opportunity arose I just got used to it. This is a good thing, because my goal for next year is to be on the speaking circuit myself. To prepare myself for this professional speaking goal I have taken some other steps. I am writing a book about my very interesting and at times challenging life. Once upon a time I would have been too scared to think of myself as an author. To overcome this fear I started to write articles for others to read. Because I took the step to have some of them published on various online article websites, I have the confidence to keep writing them.

The biggest risk I took was leaving my full time job to start the bureau. In hindsight I think I should have kept the full time job for a bit longer, as it was very challenging, now of course, I am glad I quit because I am so passionate about what I do. It was terrifying making the decision to leave that paid security but I did it anyway, I figured I could always get another job if things didn’t turn out.

Last year I travelled to the United Kingdom with one of my brothers. He and I had a very fearful job to do. We went over prepared with a DNA kit to test his baby without the mother’s permission. She had left the country with my brother’s daughter without telling him. He came home one evening and mum and baby were gone. My brother was mortified. We knew something was not right because there was no reason in the world for her to leave, she had a yacht, flat in Hong Kong and a very privileged life. On the first day in the UK I was able to get my niece to myself for a moment and I raced her into our hotel room to do the test, I could hardly hold the cotton tip because I was terrified and my hands were shaking and my heart pouding. Thank goodness we did it because the baby was not my brother’s and although he was devastated and it took a long time, he was then able to slowly build back his life.

Sometimes in life we miss out on the things we really want because we are too scared to move out of our comfort zone. We won’t ask that person out because we might get rejected. We won’t commit to a relationship because we might get hurt. We won’t write that book because it might not get published. We won’t stand up and do that comedy routine because we might get booed off stage. We won’t leave our job because our new one might be even worse. We won’t spend that money on a holiday because we might need it in an emergency. We won’t ask that question we want to in a seminar because people might think we are stupid. We won’t enter the talent contest because we might not win. We won’t say I love you because they might not love us back. So what! Another chapter of your life closed…next please!